Post by jodif on Jul 2, 2011 22:12:02 GMT -5
I'm 30 years old and I'm having surgery on Tuesday (hysterectomy). Most of the time a hysterectomy is a routine surgery, but in my case, it's major surgery. The incision will go all the way from my pelvis to my my sternum (vertical incision). The doctor is concerned about blood loss. I feel a sense of loss. It's not the fact that I won't be able to have children, because I don't want kids, but it's something else. It's kind of like I won't be the same person as odd at that sounds. I try not to think about it because it stresses me. I'm terrified and no one seems to want to hear that. I'm terrified because the surgery is complicated and I could die on the table. I'm afraid something else could go wrong and I will need additional surgeries. I'm afraid of not being the same person that I was when I went in. My mother tells me that the only reason why I'm afraid is because I don't have Jesus in my life. I don't believe that and that was certainly not what I wanted to hear (whole other can of worms). I don' t want to share this part of me with my wife and stress her out as well, so I share this here in the hopes that writing out my fears will get them out of my system.