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Post by mightymouse on Jun 20, 2011 7:13:04 GMT -5
 Coming out is really hard and I don't think people realize how hard it is until they have to come out. But I don't know why people want to hide who they are and I think it would help if everyone came out. Aren't you living a lie if you are in the closet? If you are in the closet because it's your job but you hide aren't you in the wrong job? I think people need to come out even if it's hard. If people don't accept you it's there problem not yours. Just come out cause i did. So did Ellen and it didn't hurt her. not everyone is bullied when they come out and even if they were you are gonna get bullied in the closet anyway. might as well not lie.
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Post by sharilla on Jun 21, 2011 9:51:17 GMT -5
I think it is up to each person to come out or not come out. We can never really know what they are feeling or thinking or what their situation is.
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Post by brittainesagan on Jun 21, 2011 18:16:50 GMT -5
this past year i came out as bi to 3 of my cousins, one of which is gay and my friends at work. Most of my family assumes I'm a lesbian but I don't want to come out mostly because I'm afraid of what my older sis will think. I know my mom wants me to come out cause she told my gay cousin but part of me wants to keep it from her
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Post by steellily on Jun 21, 2011 18:21:30 GMT -5
I'm out to everyone but my parents and grandmother. My mom is the Sarah Palin brand of Christian who would hang me in the front lawn as a warning to others not to infect her world with the gay. I think though that once I find someone important enough to me to commit myself to I'll come out to my mom. Though if she ever asked me out right I wouldn't lie. She just knows better. I think she knows I'm a lesbian but she so badly doesn't want to confirm it that she'll pretend for as long as she can. We've a sort of "don't ask don't tell" policy between us in many many things.
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Post by brittainesagan on Jun 21, 2011 21:08:00 GMT -5
my mom would be totally cool with it...im just afraid of the questions. my stepdad is homophobic so that is a little intimidating too and my sis is ultra conservative. i guess im just not ready yet
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Post by cyberdetective on Jun 22, 2011 16:23:31 GMT -5
Virginia Ramey Mollencott believes that there are folks who are called to a life "inside enemy territory." She calls these people tricksters. The trickster tradition, she writes, comes from biblical times and has been used throughout history. It is a way of creating change, but also as a means of survival. Abraham used the trickster tradition and even Jesus was a trickster. There are times in our lives that exposing our true nature only serves to possibly harm ourselves but harm a movement, if that makes sense. Thinking of it this way, when I was really involved in the conservative church, no one knew i was gay. Therefore, I could ask questions and create discourse on topics that would normally never be discussed. But, when I came out, well..4 years of reparative therapy later, that particular church and pastor don't listen to me anymore. I'm no longer an ally with interesting theological questions, but "one of those" people who are trying to move the faith away from the Truth. So.. in that sense, being a trickster can be beneficial. But, like mightymouse wisely said, it is much more freeing to be able to be truly authentic. Living the life of a trickster is not easy, nor is it desirable. But it is a sacred walk, one I'm glad to have ended.  |
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lynda
Junior Member
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Post by lynda on Jun 28, 2011 17:35:49 GMT -5
i am an extremely late bloomer. i only just came out to myself last year and i am now 43! i know, it's a little embarrasing for me. but i had a lot of depression and anxiety (i'm bipolar) to keep me from focusing on being a lesbian. now that i'm on a good regimen of meds and i don't have to think about my depression hardly at all now, i am finally able to deal with other things. only my parents (who were totally cool and supportive-except they don't think i should have a gay relationship) and all my therapy type people - yes i have a few - know. i am afraid to tell my younger sister because she is very conservative and i consider myself conservative also but i can't help being who i am. if i could tell her then i would feel free to tell whoever else in my life. does that make sense?
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Post by zblf10 on Jul 7, 2011 23:12:27 GMT -5
My family has already made it clear that homosexuality will not be allowed in their house and if I do some out they will kick me out and totally cut me off. I will be totally shunned by my whole family. I will be totally alone...
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lynda
Junior Member
Posts: 20
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Post by lynda on Jul 9, 2011 19:50:46 GMT -5
zblf10 i am so sorry your family reacted that way. you are in an extremely tough position to have to choose between your family and living your true self. if you are part of the face2face family, you will have support if you reach out to us like you just did. kat says that your family are the people who will never judge you and who will unconditionally love you. do you know anyone who could be that for you? if not try to stay connected with the people around you - reach out to them and build your own group of friends who will love you. and stay connected with face2face. kat has some really good advice. call in on the interview she is doing tonight (sat.) and ask a question. come to vokle on mon. nights and talk to kat. it will be posted on the face2face fb page and probably on twitter. come and be with us and we will support you. if you ever need someone to talk to message me on my fb page - Lynda K Harvey. love to you!
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Post by ciera07 on Sept 10, 2011 8:19:52 GMT -5
i have wanted to come out and a very rare amount of people know but my mom thinks im lesbian and says it is ok to come out then she turns around and talk shit....... it is VERY hard when u live in a small town with everyone so againstgay people. what shoud i do and how would i come out?
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